| Basically a 90s
twist on Some Like it Hot, high-profile
Sundance acquisition Happy, Texas is cute,
lightweight and not unlike a big bowl of Chinese
food damn enjoyable while youre
wolfing it down, but ultimately leaving an empty
feeling in your belly an hour after you consume
it. Here, Jack Lemmon and Tony Curtis are
replaced by Jeremy Northam and Steve Zahn, and
instead of posing as female musicians they must
pretend to be homosexual beauty pageant
coordinators. The film opens with
three convicts chained together while on highway
clean-up detail. There is a brainy one named
Harry Sawyer (Northam, An Ideal Husband),
a brawny one named Bob (M.C. Gainey, ConAir)
and a goofy, short one named Wayne Wayne Wayne
Jr. (Zahn, Youve Got Mail). There is
also a funny gag involving a dead armadillo (if
you find dead armadillos humorous) which leads to
the three felons being driven back to prison for
punishment. But their van crashes during a fight
between Wayne and Bob, and the jailbirds escape.
Bob
heads in one direction while Harry and Wayne
steal a recreational vehicle from the parking lot
of a convenience store gas station. While parked
in the dark several miles later, they are picked
up by Happys Town Sheriff Chappy Dent
(William H. Macy, Mystery Men), who leads
the men into the courthouse packed with local
officials. Harry and Wayne think theyre
about to be thrown back into the clink, while
everybody else assumes that they are David and
Steven, the national beauty pageant experts that
Happy has hired to boost the chances of a local
girl qualifying for a state beauty pageant. When
the locals begin to negotiate their salary, Harry
and Wayne think that their prison sentence is
being haggled. Hilarity ensues.
The
cons plan on picking up their fee in the morning
and skipping town, but the observant Harry
overhears the potential for a bigger score while
waiting in line at the town bank. In two weeks,
local farmers will cash giant checks for the
years harvest, meaning the bank will have a
ton of cash ripe for misappropriation. So Harry
and Wayne decide to stick it out and pretend to
be the pageant pros, thinking that watching
teen-aged girls prance around in leotards may not
be a bad way to spend some time while laying low.
Surprise
No. 1 comes when they find out that the
contestants in the Little Miss Fresh Squeezed
Pre-Teen Talent Competition are about half the
age they expected. Surprise No. 2 comes when they
find out that the guys theyre impersonating
are a gay couple. The whole town of Happy thinks
the manly jailbirds are in a relationship and
they have no choice but to play along. Apparently
above the usual opinionated views that small-town
Southerners may have about alternative
lifestyles, the residents of Happy embrace Harry
and David as celebrities, acknowledging their
obvious talent for pizzazz by admitting
"Theyre crafty that way."
Things
proceed predictably from here, with Harry
beginning to con the relationship-phobic banker
(Ally Walker, Profiler) and eventually
falling for her, while Wayne is stuck with the
talentless kids, forced to learn how to sew and
dance. Not to be outquirked, Sheriff Chappy even
has a sexual identity crisis.
Prior
to the screening of this film at the Toronto
International Film Festival, first-time director
and co-writer Mark Illsley (who was the assistant
on Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves)
explained that about fifteen to twenty minutes of
footage was reshot and inserted into the film
after it played the Sundance Film Festival (where
Zahn earned special acting honors). It appeared
to me that most of the new scenes center around
the relationship between Harry and the banker,
which is too bad because I would have preferred
to see more of the pageant preparation (Zahn) and
less of the romance. You could also tell new
footage from the old by Zahns disappearing "soul patch" (the hair right under his bottom lip).
But the film is still a blast to watch, if not
just for the wonderful actors involved in the
project (Zahn took home a special acting award
from Sundance), who reportedly all worked for
scale.
1:44
for mild violence, sexual content and
adult language and situations
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