Okay, somebody is going to have to explain how a film like The Da Vinci Code can be the center of a non-stop controversy hurricane because of its alleged manipulation of Christianity’s fairy tales while Nacho Libre – a movie about a priest becoming a wrestler so he can stick his hands up the skirt of a cute nun – gets a free pass.  I’m baffled, and if I was the religious sort, I’d be 100 times more offended by this picture than Code or any of the films on Entertainment Weekly’s recent list of controversial movies.  But I’m a secular man, which left me in the enviable position of being able to go home and beat it to the mental image of a woman of the cloth.  ¡Aye carumba!

Libre is offensive, even if you take away the religious angle.  It will insult your intelligence, as well as your sense of humor.  I’m not sure how Mexicans are going to feel about it, since they’re mostly portrayed as clueless, ugly, and poor.  For the record, I’m pretty sure this is not the case, except for fans of El Tricolor, who definitely are clueless and ugly, but of an undetermined financial status.  They are, surely, children of unmarried adults.

Libre is about a priest named Nacho (Jack Black, King Kong) responsible for providing food to the residents of the extremely rural Mexican orphanage where he has lived since childhood (how this lead to a career of the cloth is not explained).  Because the orphanage’s top dog is a cheapskate, Nacho is forced to serve inedible dishes to the children.

For some reason, the arrival of a super-attractive nun (Ana de la Reguera) inspires Nacho to become a luchador – one of those flamboyant wrestlers with the extravagant costumes, masks, and cheesy moves.  He’s doing this, we suppose, to win the affection of Sister Encarnación (who doesn’t know a thing about wrestling), as well as making some extra cheese to buy better ingredients for the orphanage’s pantries.  But in all actuality, it probably has a lot more to do with Nacho’s self-esteem issues than anything else.  The whole “helping the orphans” thing merely allows the film to get away with some pretty questionable material.

In other words, Libre is a one-joke premise about a fat guy and his skinny sidekick (Héctor Jiménez) training for and competing in the ring.  Thankfully, writer-director Jared Hess has the common sense to keep the running time short.  The creator of Napoleon Dynamite, a film that I really liked, goes down like El Matador in the penalty box.  Hess directs with a style that is very reminiscent of Wes Anderson, when it comes to framing shots, dressing the set, and carefully selecting his soundtrack.  But you could also compare Hess to Todd Solondz, because of his knack for casting unattractive acting talent with what appears to be no past experience in front of the camera.  Unfortunately, Libre doesn’t come close to equaling the worst efforts from those two filmmakers.

1:25 – for some rough action, and crude humor including dialogue