July 9, 2003

Last time out.  The Rhinos haven't scored three goals in one half in a really long time. Heck, they only scored three goals in two halves once last year. When they accomplished this feat in the first half of the July 4 match against Toronto (6-3-8, 21 points), nobody thought they'd do it again quite so quickly. But Fred Commodore had other plans, netting a second-half hat trick that <insert fireworks joke here>. The final was 6-1.

Doug Miller (11+3=25) and Company destroyed the streaky Lynx on countless counter-attacks, exploiting a three-man back line that clearly wasn't up to the task. On the other end, Craig Demmin shut Ali Ngon down like a Flint, Michigan auto plant, while theatrical crybaby Sebastian Barclay managed to sneak one by Billy Andracki early in the match (Barclay's line against Rochester this year, including pre-season and Can-Am Cup: Four matches, three goals, two yellows and one red).

There could have been many more goals, too, and all of it kept distracting The Score from being distracted by the special Independence Day outfits adorning the Rhinestones. Jamel Mitchell hit the upright on an open net, which pretty much sums up his career as a Rhino (not bad, but extremely unlucky). And Commodore -- remember when he scored, like, nine goals in four minutes in a pre-season game, then was injured in the next match? Maybe this is what he does when he's healthy.

So the Rhinos (10-2-4, 32) are one point behind Montreal and have outscored opponents 10-1 over the last three games. Had you made the second half of that statement in 2002, you probably would have been slapped across the face and branded a heretic.

Next up. Virginia Beach (7-2-5, 23) brings ex-Rhino Hamisi Amani-Dove to Frontier this Friday in a battle of the league's top two offensive teams, as well as the league's top two goal-scorers. Dante Washington (11+2=24) leads the Mariners but is only one of many scoring threats. Roy Lassiter (3+4=10), Pato Aguilera (5+6=16), and Dove (2+3=7) are all legitimate Rhino killers.

On the plus side, the Mariners are 0-1-3 on the road in 2003 - one of the league's worst marks. VeeBee is also playing in Syracuse on Wednesday, so maybe they'll be all pooped out (or, knowing the S-Dogs, severely banged up). The Rhinos hold a 2-0-2 lifetime record against the Mariners.

Less than 24 hours later, Rochester hits the road for a do-or-die Can-Am Cup match against Syracuse (6-2-6, 20) at the Soccer Hall of Fame in Oneonta. If the Rhinos draw or win, they advance to the July 30 final in Montreal. The already-eliminated S-Dogs, led by Gabe Valencia (7+1=15), are just 1-2-4 after a 5-0-2 start, and they've scored only twice in their last four outings. As silly as Rochester made Toronto look last weekend, consider this: The Lynx are still ahead of Syracuse in the standings. The Rhinos are 2-0-1 against the S-Dogs.

And this Thursday, we'll finally learn who Rochester will face in next Wednesday's US Open Cup third-round match at Frontier. Here's a hint:  It'll be someone you've never seen play here before.

Where have you gone, Andy Restrepo? Montreal snapped its one-match losing skid in Syracuse last week, with Mauro Biello and Eddy Sebrango scoring for the Impact. The victory clinched home-field advantage for the Can-Am Cup title match. Mike Kirmse scored for the S-Dogs, who drew 8,061 flea-bitten fans. Kirmse also had a yellow card (his sixth in 2003), which is only slightly less impressive than Rene Rivas earning three in as many matches.

Greg Simmonds didn't extend his three-match scoring streak but he did have an assist in Richmond's 2-1 road loss to Atlanta. John Ball assisted on Atlanta's winner against Seattle, and Aleksey Korol did the same in Pittsburgh's 4-2 loss to the lowly Charlotte Eagles (it was their third win of the season).

Around the A-League. Speaking of Pittsburgh, defender David Wright amassed his third red card of the campaign in that Charlotte loss. Shouldn't you go to jail after two? And if you think that's bad, you must not have heard about Sunday's Cincinnati and El Paso skirmish, which saw four players ejected (three from the Patriots saw red after the 89th minute).

Rumors say the Cincinnati team are about to be run (if they aren't already) by the league. Four starters were released from the Riverhawks roster, and they still managed to win their next match. They're like the Bad News Bears of the A-League!

Noureddine "Dino" Maamria is bad news, too, but in a different way. The new Charleston signing has been on the roster for just three matches but has somehow found it in his heart to amass a red card and a yellow card (bookending a suspension for the red). Congratulations, Dino! You're the A-League Thug of the Week!

MLS update. Pat Onstad held Ante Razov and Damiani Ralph (and the rest of Chicago) scoreless in another 0-0 draw (can enough of them actually kill you?). Onstad will miss his next few starts, as he will be with Team Canada for their appearance in the Gold Cup. You can watch him take on Costa Rica live Saturday afternoon on Univision.

Read the last issue of The Score here.